Newsflash, sailors. Nefarious is the new proud carrier of the Port Townsend Dash record. Unfamiliar? It's the fastest elapsed time from Shilshole to Port Townsend, in a nutshell. Read about it on the Pressure Drop Forum here. Want more details? You'll have to talk to the Cap'N...I'm just the lowly pit girl (read: boat beer bitch) and storyteller. So, enjoy. And sail fast. Don' forget to sail fast. Please break our record. Seriously. Read on.
The Nefarious Dash: Attempt 1.
All
of a sudden, there it was: the Dash trifecta. Big South wind. Big
ebb. Big desire to throw some old sails on your Farr 30, round up your
crew on short notice because you know they’re as crazy as you are, and
head to Port Townsend as fast as you can. Seattlite Nefarians
confirmed the forecast holding up would mean hookie, ditching, dropping,
cancelling any other plans by any means necessary to make boat time on
Monday morning. Tommy Watson, the Bay area honorary Nefarian, got the
call mid-dinner Friday night that the Dash is happening! and landed in Seattle 6 hours later.
Sunday evening the eager girl was splashed and loaded with a few old sails and the promise of speed before most of the crew would gather for food a la Chef Sandra and mental preparation.
The forecast Monday morning from the breakfast table at Salmon Bay Cafe over bacon and eggs and more bacon for the Peterson Brothers had still been promising 45kt winds gusting up to 60. Dan sat mulling over current wind conditions: "It's between 20 and 40 now, a little less wind on this end, a little more wind up there. I don't think it's going above 40." Although this meant potentially far less wind than Alex Simanis had sailed North in to break the previous record, it also meant light enough wind to fly the kite all the way up...which meant serious, serious fun. "Well, they cancelled the Port Townsend ferry, so we don't need to worry about that...” Andy kindly informed the crew with a sly grin. Translation? Gale force wind: yes. Traffic: no. Perfect!
A few short minutes to boat time were followed by a few longer minutes to launch time as Cap’N Dan made the wait call for Ray and his kite trimming skillz to climb down from the wintery mountain woodwork into Seattle and onto the boat. In the meantime, Little Blue Dune Buggy’s skipper himself came to see Nefarious off to chase his own record- a testament to the sportsmanship inherent in a shared passion for testing the limit of boat and skill. Um and speed. Lots of it.
And just like that, Neffy was off! Spinnaker up, and ZOOM! to the middle of the channel, WEEE! towards Whidbey, HELL YES! around Point no Point, and- wait. Uhhh.
Wtf?! Is that a submarine?
Yes. A nuclear submarine, making it’s jolly way out of the Hood Canal with a handful of escorts and right on course to take Nefarious to stern with maybe a few hundred yards to spare. Including a USCG vessel which had diverted to pay the dashers a ‘visit,’ so hey! Jibe time! Or, alternatively, jibe, broach, and winch the kite in by the last remaining sheet on the boat while reaching in to take a submarine to stern at a greater than 2,000-yard distance. Whichever worked. (The latter worked.) The unplanned reach in towards Skunk Bay brought just enough time to rerun the sheets and guys before jibing North through the churning Hood Canal Log Grove. There were little logs and big logs, oddly-shaped monstrosities and regular tree-looking things, jostling about at just the right speed to keep the game of sailboat Frogger alive for a little while longer.
Sunday evening the eager girl was splashed and loaded with a few old sails and the promise of speed before most of the crew would gather for food a la Chef Sandra and mental preparation.
“Should we take that bottle of champagne from the fridge on the boat tomorrow...?”
“No. Lance brought one last Saturday on USA55. We lost a winch handle overboard and ran aground.”
“Good call. I’ll bring a bottle of Kraken instead.”
“Good call.”
“You guys. Seriously. We should watch The Perfect Storm tonight.”
“No we shouldn’t. They never made it back.”
“Hmm...Captain Ron?”
“YES!!”
The forecast Monday morning from the breakfast table at Salmon Bay Cafe over bacon and eggs and more bacon for the Peterson Brothers had still been promising 45kt winds gusting up to 60. Dan sat mulling over current wind conditions: "It's between 20 and 40 now, a little less wind on this end, a little more wind up there. I don't think it's going above 40." Although this meant potentially far less wind than Alex Simanis had sailed North in to break the previous record, it also meant light enough wind to fly the kite all the way up...which meant serious, serious fun. "Well, they cancelled the Port Townsend ferry, so we don't need to worry about that...” Andy kindly informed the crew with a sly grin. Translation? Gale force wind: yes. Traffic: no. Perfect!
A few short minutes to boat time were followed by a few longer minutes to launch time as Cap’N Dan made the wait call for Ray and his kite trimming skillz to climb down from the wintery mountain woodwork into Seattle and onto the boat. In the meantime, Little Blue Dune Buggy’s skipper himself came to see Nefarious off to chase his own record- a testament to the sportsmanship inherent in a shared passion for testing the limit of boat and skill. Um and speed. Lots of it.
And just like that, Neffy was off! Spinnaker up, and ZOOM! to the middle of the channel, WEEE! towards Whidbey, HELL YES! around Point no Point, and- wait. Uhhh.
Wtf?! Is that a submarine?
Yes. A nuclear submarine, making it’s jolly way out of the Hood Canal with a handful of escorts and right on course to take Nefarious to stern with maybe a few hundred yards to spare. Including a USCG vessel which had diverted to pay the dashers a ‘visit,’ so hey! Jibe time! Or, alternatively, jibe, broach, and winch the kite in by the last remaining sheet on the boat while reaching in to take a submarine to stern at a greater than 2,000-yard distance. Whichever worked. (The latter worked.) The unplanned reach in towards Skunk Bay brought just enough time to rerun the sheets and guys before jibing North through the churning Hood Canal Log Grove. There were little logs and big logs, oddly-shaped monstrosities and regular tree-looking things, jostling about at just the right speed to keep the game of sailboat Frogger alive for a little while longer.
One
careful depth-conscious rounding at Marrowstone point later and- gasp! -
the finish line was in sight! Yes! Four wipe-outs, three wind
directions, two tattered sails and one submarine diversion later, the
question became whether having the red buoy in sight in any way
translated to actually reaching
it with the half hour or so left on the clock. “Seriously guys...”
Cap’N Dan rallied his Nefarians. “Let’s just not wipe out anymore and
we should be fine...” The boat responded shortly with a hard broach during a sudden heavy gust, as if to roar:
I AM NEFARIOUS!!
I SHALL HAVE MY FUN!
THIS IS BUT CHILD’S PLAY! WHERE IS MY WIND??!
PFFFFT.
The record-breaking attempt may best be summarized by the Cap’N’s demeanor whilst Nefarious found herself less than upright. Although he would later exclaim, "It's a little
disconcerting when the boat's laying on her side and we're going five
knots," it was Sandra who would ultimately expose the truest nature of
the experience. “Every time we broached, I looked over at Dan and he
was grinning ear to ear.” Undoubtedly a statement suited to vouch for
every sailor on Nefarious that day, or any day, right down to the Kraken waiting for it's victory release at the finish.
And just like that, the the mighty Nefarious
recovered gracefully and took a final reach into the buoy, surely pleased with herself, and
carried her sailors to victory with ten minutes to spare. Hugs were
exchanged, Krakens of rum released from their bottles, and bouts of
laughter spilled over into the bay. She made her way into the
marina for a short repose as 8 happily soaked sailors paid
a visit to Sirens for a pint or five or lost count. As Cap’N Dan and Tommy took one for the
team to transfer Nef back in the same wind (now on the nose) that had
brought her, the rest of the crew tumbled into the ultimate post-dash
comfort ride. A ride which Wendell had not only graciously hauled
himself to Port Townsend in just for the occasion, but had brought along
his own thoughtful sailing advice at no charge: "You know, the one
thing a boat's always gotta give way to, is a pedestrian." So true,
Wendell. So true.
.PNG) |
| The Neffy Dash crew (starboard to port): Brad Peterson, Andy Vatter, Sandra Stark, Tommy Watson, Cap'N Dan Randolph, Yours Truly, Ray Hines, and Scotty Peterson. Go team! |
